Most Common Reasons Babies Wake Up at Night

    
Using Props

The use of props to help a baby fall asleep, is the number one reason a sleeping baby wakes up at night (something I learned from the Sleep Sense Program)  Here are some common props or sleep associations: 


  • Bottle or breastfeeding to sleep, 
  • Rocking to sleep 
  • Swinging to sleep
  • White noise machines
  • Movement in a carseat or stroller.
  • Even the *pacifier if your baby is dependent on it. 

Anything your baby relies on to fall asleep, she will also need when she wakes up at night. She will not be able to soothe herself back to sleep, without that particular prop. Your baby should always go to sleep awake, *without any props. Trust me, your baby will find a way to soothe herself. When Brianna was in the  HALO SleepSack , she would rub her face against the sheets. She would turn her head side to side, until she fell asleep. She now sways her hand across the sheets back and forth. The texture of the sheet soothes her, and she falls asleep. That would never cross my mind as soothing, but that's what she does. We even bought her these velour sheets, which she absolutely loved.

By teaching your baby to fall asleep on her own, and getting rid of sleep props, you will solve most, if not all of your sleep troubles. I am not suggesting, by any means, to be cold or harsh to your baby. As a matter of fact you want to do everything you can, to comfort your baby before bed. Kisses, hugs, and cuddling, that's the best part of our bedtime routine! You want to do that to make your baby feel safe, secure, and loved. Just don't make that the reason they fall asleep. Here is my article about sleep associations.

***A few notes I need to make. You don't want to impose anything strict on a newborn. You need to give them some time to transition. When you first bring your newborn home, you may need some props such as a white noise machine. It can help your baby associate night with sleep-time, since babies have an immature circadian rhythm (more on that below). Certain props such as womb sounds, will also help your baby transition into the outside world, remember they are very confused when they finally make their grand entrance.

***Another note, is on the use of the pacifier. I encourage the use of a pacifier because it has been shown to reduce the risk of SIDS. However, if your baby is crying in the middle of the night because it fell out, and you need to go and put it back in, then you might want evaluate if you really want to use it. This is a personal choice, one you will have to make weighing your pros and cons. I thought Brianna was reliant on the pacifier, then I put her to the test. I took the binky away, and let her fall asleep without it for a few nights, and she didn't cry for it. So I knew she wasn't relying on it. She falls asleep with it, but doesn't care when it falls out. So I decided to keep it. I think I would of kept it either way, at least for the first few months because of the whole SIDS thing. Tell a nurse something reduces SIDS, and she's not going to think twice.
 
Circadian  Rhythm

 It's also known as our biological clock. It's a 24 hour pattern of biological activities that occur in our body. The sleep-wake cycle is part of that circadian rhythm. In the sleep-wake, our body releases certain hormones during nighttime to help us fall asleep. It also releases daytime hormones to make us wake up. Babies are born with an under developed circadian rhythm. That's why when you bring them home from the hospital, they sleep during the day, and are awake at night. Also, don't forget throughout your pregnancy, your baby was rocked to sleep during the day by your movements. You most likely felt her movements at night, when she was awake! So what can you do to help your little night owl? Just keep your baby on a regular feeding cycle. Keep the blinds open, turn on the t.v or radio, and just go about your day as you normal would to help create an association with daytime. Then at night, obviously the exact opposite. Quiet all noise, turn down the lights, and establish your bedtime routine. Be patient it can take some babies up to 8 weeks to know the difference between day and night. To complicate things even more, melatonin (the sleep hormone) is not produced until a baby is about 3 months old. So don't get discouraged, it takes a while for a baby to settle into this world.

Startle Reflex

Also known as the Moro reflex, is a normal infantile reflex. When some stimulus causes the baby to startle, the legs flex and the arms stretch out. This stimulus can be a loud noise, an unexpected touch, or a bad dream. This reflex lasts only a few seconds but can wake a sleeping baby. Some babies can drift right back to sleep others will completely wake up. This reflex usually diminishes by 4 months of age. Until then the  Swaddle SleepSack is great. Those nifty velcro patches were intended to keep the babies arms inside and prevent wakening from the startle reflex. Don't believe me? Check it out! I watched Brianna, completely wake up from the startle reflex over and over. Her arms would fan out and she was awake! That's when I decided to put her in the Swaddle Sack. She slept so much better.


Temperature 
  
At one point Brianna started waking more frequently for a few days in a row, right at the start of winter. I noticed her little hands and feet were cold. Now it's pretty warm in our house. As a matter of fact, I slept in shorts and a tank top. Apparently that wasn't warm enough for Brianna. I had to adjust the temperature for her. When I did, she was back to her normal sleep schedule. The same thing happened in the summer when it got really warm out. At this point she was sleeping through the night, and I found her waking up a few nights...apparently it was too warm for her. It's only April, I thought! I never turn on the air condition this early! I had to put a low fan setting on the a.c. and that kept her comfortable. Babies are picky about the right temperature. We naturally regulated their temperatures for them, while they were in utero. Now, it's a little bit more difficult to get that temperature just right.

Hunger

Ok this may sound self explanatory but it's not. You may Think your baby is hungry, but she may not be. Here are some clues your baby is waking up because she is truly hungry:

1.She's wakes up whining at first, then transitions into a louder and louder cry. If your baby wakes up hysterical, she's probably waking up because she's scared or confused not because she's immediately hungry. Babies will wake up screaming if they fell asleep in your arms, and didn't go to sleep on their own. They wake up alarmed, wondering where they are, and where you disappeared.

2. She is waking up consistent with her daytime feeding schedule. Meaning if she's eating every 4 hours during the day, she will probably do the same at night. Now this can be purely out of habit, so continue reading to see if other clues are present

3. When your baby is eating, you hear loud, audible swallows. What I mean is, she is not just playing around, suckling a little here, a little there. She is truly drinking and actively eating. Some babies wake up from a sleep cycle, and just want to be soothed back to sleep, and the bottle or breast is obviously going to do the trick. Brianna was infamous for this for a while. She would wake up, suckle a little, and fall right asleep on me. I would slip her into bed and half hour to an hour later, she did it again. She wasn't hungry. She was using me as a soother!

4. Your baby stays awake during the entire feeding, and usually drinks a large bottle or feed from both breasts. A baby wouldn't be able to eat that much, if she was not hungry. If her stomach was full, she would probably eat a little bit and fall asleep on the bottle or breast. If that's the case she is using you or the bottle for comfort.

5.Here's the biggie, your baby falls asleep after you place her back in the crib awake! Now only a content baby could do that. If you fulfilled her need for calories because she was hungry, and she falls asleep knowing that she is back in her crib, then she was definitely hungry. Otherwise she would put up a fight and stay awake.

When Brianna was finally waking only to eat, I knew she was truly hungry. By now I learned the difference. She would guzzle her milk like it's the last time she would ever have it. She stayed awake the whole time with the sole intention of eating. She didn't play around, waste time, or fall asleep on the breast. When she was done (usually within 10min), I would place her back in the crib awake. She fell asleep right away, of course so did I, and we both woke up with a smile in the morning. And she did this until she was just about 8 months. I hated when people told me by baby should of been sleeping through the night a long time ago. Really? so I'm suppose to ignore her cry for hunger??? Trust me, I know my baby I thought, and I just continued to read her cues. When she was ready and mature enough to feel satiated throughout the night, she didn't wake anymore and that's that. Every baby is different. I even emailed the Sleep Sense Program who's opinion I truly value, just to make sure I was doing things right by still feeding her, and this is the response I got:

Hi Violet,

That is absolutely fine then as long as she is staying awake for it and falling asleep in her bed, on her own afterward. You're on the right path!


Best,


Regan Forsyth
Sleep Sense Client Support

Growth Spurt

We all heard about this right? Your baby grows at a rapid rate and needs to eat more. Common growth spurts are 7-10 days, 3 weeks, 6 weeks, 3 months and 6 months give or take a little, they are not exact. Brianna must of hit ever single one of these. She was on a great sleep schedule, then all of the sudden started waking frequently. I knew it was only a growth spurt, because it only lasted 3-4 days. After a while, I loved growth spurts. Because at the end of each growth spurt, she would get right back on her sleep schedule, but slept a little bit longer. Just feed on demand during a growth spurt. If you are breastfeeding, don't worry about your supply being low. Your supply will actually increase to meet the demand of your baby. I always thought it was cool how that works. Don't forget to drink extra fluids, your going to be thirsty from all the feedings. And if you are bottle feeding, your partner can help with the extra feedings. Growth spurts can be exhausting but thankfully they don't last long.

New Developmental Skill

Your baby learned how to kick, roll, sit or stand and now they want to do it all night. Sound familiar? You can't stop a baby from exploring her new skills. For younger babies, the Swaddle Sack is great. You can use it up until your baby starts to roll. It keeps their little arms and legs inside. At first I felt a little weird about using it. Why should I restrain my baby? I thought. But you're not actually restraining your baby. You are keeping her snug, and preventing her from even getting the idea of kicking or swinging her arms. At first I was swaddling Brianna in a regular receiving blanket. It didn't take long for her to slip out of there. As soon as an arm or leg broke loose, she fully woke up to further experiment. With the SleepSack , that never even crossed her mind because, her extremities never came out of it. She slept so soundly in it. You see why I love this thing?

When Brianna learned how to sit and crawl, that's all she wanted to do. I would put her in the crib awake, and up she went. When this happens, all you need to do is gently remind your baby it's time to sleep. Then place her into her usual sleep position. Your obviously going to have to keep putting her into that position over and over, because chances are she's going to keep getting up. Keep conversation to a minimum, so that you do not stimulate her. Only repeat it's sleepy time if she really resists, whines, or fusses. Your baby could be testing you, to see if you allow her to play. Just keep placing her back. If you did your bedtime routine, and did everything else right, your baby will eventually fall asleep. Because guess what time it is ?...sleepy time, meaning she is already drowsy and tired. Your baby will soon tire out and give up, and fall asleep.

I also encourage lots of playtime on the mat during the day. This helps your baby practice her new skills, so she's not doing it so much at night. Unfortunately there's not much you can do when your baby is going through this part of development. Just wait it out, until your baby learns and masters the skill. She will soon go back to her regular sleep schedule. Learn more about sleep regression here

Teething

For some babies teething can feel like an itch, and for others it can be very painful. But either way, it's annoying and can keep a baby up. 6 months is the average time a baby gets her first tooth, but it can be way earlier or later. Bottom line, you will have to find some way to ease the pain. Talk to to your doctor about some options. You can also check out my article Chamomile for Babies. I have some really neat tips.

Light

Is there any light coming in the room? Perhaps it's a full moon, or your neighbor just bought a new garage light. Lights can really bother a sleeping baby, because they disrupt the sleep-wake cycle. Illumination suppresses Melatonin, the hormone that helps us sleep. If that's the case, just buy room darkening or black out shades. Before we put Brianna in her own room, she slept 2 hours later in our bedroom which has the room darkening shades. That's when we knew we had to do something. She's one of those babies that wakes as soon as there's any bit of light. The shades are great, they keep the bright sunlight out. Some babies are more sensitive than others. Studies show that even a small amount of light can prevent you from going into sleep and staying asleep. You may have to get rid of the cute nightlight you registered for, or cover up the light on the smoke detector. I actually had to cover the green light coming from the baby monitor camera. I just stuck a piece of black tape on the light. I caught Brianna staring at it the first few nights we installed it, it was preventing her from falling asleep. It was such a tiny pin size light, but it still bothered her.

You can buy room darkening shades in Home Depot or Lowe's. You might have to custom order the black out shades, which don't permit any light. You can also check out these blackout shades. I have done some research and these look like they are great quality shades, that don't cost too much. They are less expensive than custom shades and also have great reviews.

Illness
It should be no surprise that a baby that is sick, is now waking in the middle of the night. Wether it's a cold, stomach bug, or just a fever, your baby will have a hard time sleeping due to the discomfort. Stuffy noses cause mouth breathing, and mouth breathing causes dry mouth, which in turn makes your baby wake more frequently. Fevers are also very uncomfortable, even for us adults, so think about what it does to our babies who can't communicate their needs.


If your baby is still waking, for reasons other than the ones mentioned above, you may want to try taking a free sleep report, to see what's going on with your child's sleep. You answer a few questions, and get emailed back a detailed report with suggestions on what to do. Check it out here.




When should you start sleep training



Teaching your baby good sleep habits should be done as early as they know the difference between day and night. “By three months, sleep habits are fairly set,” says Dr. Mindell, so it’s crucial to start sleep training before this age. You don't want to  impose anything strict on a newborn. They are confused enough, don't add to the confusion. Give them a few weeks to adjust.

The first part of sleep training which is a bedtime routine, can be done as soon as they get over the initial day/night confusion. For some babies this can be as fast as 2 weeks for others it can take up to 8 weeks. Sleep training while a baby is still confused about day and night can be a set up for failure. A baby is not going to want to lay down to sleep at 8pm when they have been sleeping all day and now they think it's time to play. Help them out. Remind your baby daytime is for playing by keeping blinds open, t.v on, carry on normal conversation and wake the baby up to eat regularly. The opposite goes at night. Quiet voices, dim lights, or lullaby. A sound soother like this one works great to calm a newborn down at night.

After your baby starts spending more time awake during the day and settling down at night, they are ready for a bedtime routine which is going to be at the same exact time every night. Make up a routine that works best for you and your baby. Perhaps a song, massage and story, or anything else your baby likes. Then put your baby to bed awake...yes awake. You want to start good habits straight from the beginning. Remember how you put your baby to sleep is how they will expect to fall asleep when they wake up in the middle of the night. So if you put your baby to sleep awake, and she falls asleep on her own, then she will do the same in the middle of the night. Meaning you won't have to get up to put her back to sleep. Now remember at this point you will still need to get up for feedings. It is too early to wean your baby off of night time feedings, but you are working towards a goal of them just waking for feedings and nothing else. And when they are ready to sleep through the night without any feedings, they will have the skill necessary to fall asleep on their own and stay asleep.


The next part of sleep training is getting your baby to sleep through the night without any feedings, if they are ready of course. Now the age for this varies, and the best person to ask is your Pediatrician. They know your baby best. In order to start weaning your baby off of night-time feedings, they have to be steadily gaining weight, growing in height and not have any medical conditions. Most pediatricians says anywhere from 4-6 months, a baby is ready to sleep through the night without any feeds. And at this point you can start testing your baby to see if they are truly hungry or just using you for comfort. See how to tell the difference here (under hunger). Now just because some babies are ready at this age doesn't mean they will sleep through the night. So don't give up on sleep training just because your baby is not sleeping all the way through. If you are doing everything right and your baby is still only waking up to eat, then that is completely normal. Remember it's not until 9 months that 70-80% of babies sleep through without any feeds. 

Remember that sleep training is not easy and it will never be perfect. Here are some bumps your are going to hit along the road, during the first year. 

0-2 months
  • Day/night confusion.-Your baby's sleep-wake cycle doesn't start to develop until 6 weeks, and it's  not completely regular until 3-6 months
  • Your baby won't start producing enough melatonin, the hormone that helps us sleep, until about 3 months.Getting to sleep and staying sleep will take major work at this age.
  • Your baby will also hit their first 3 growth spurts during this time (1 week, 3 weeks, and 6 weeks)


3-4 month
  • First sleep regression. Baby is learning new skills, rolling, turning, kicking and wants to practice even at night when they should be sleeping.
  • 3 month growth spurt.


5-7 months
  • Sitting. Babies love to practice sitting especially when you lay them down to sleep.This will pass once they have mastered the skill.
  • 6 month growth spurt


7-9 months
  • Crawling.
  • 2nd sleep regression. Babies loves practicing their emerging skills like crawling in their sleep. It's going to be hard to get him to sleep. Be patient once they figure out the skill they are practicing, they  will go back to a normal sleep schedule.
  • Babies also understand object permanence at this age. Meaning they know something exists even when its not in sight. So when they wake up at night they miss you and might be looking for you.


9-10 months
  • Separation anxiety starts to peak. It's going to be hard for your baby to fall asleep and stay asleep some nights. Especially when you come back from a party or event, where there were unfamiliar faces, your baby will be nervous about separating from you.
  • Standing. Your going to lay your baby down and up to a standing position they go. If they are standing up just to practice, this will go away once they mastered the skill. 


11-12 months 
  • Language development. Babies are thinking of words they have learned, and may be practicing them in their heads, instead of sleeping.
  • 12 month regression. Babies are learning to walk and this can carry over into sleep.
  • At this age your baby also will most likely fight everything you ask them to do, especially if it's something they don't want to do, this includes napping and bedtime. Babies at this age like to test you, now that they are discovering that what they do has an effect on your reaction. You might of had a very easy baby up until this point, but now they are fighting being put down every time.






Bragging Moms


Ugh... those annoying bragging moms. Now I'm not talking about about proud moms. There's a difference. We are all proud of our babies, as we should be. I am talking about the moms that constantly boast, brag, and make you feel like you and your baby are inadequate .We all know those moms right? The ones that have conversations that go something like this: "My Johnny was sleeping through the night at 2 weeks. He cut his first tooth at 3 months. And started walking at 6 months" ...Yea ok, and let me guess, he said hippopotamus at 12 months!?!


First of all, if someone is telling you that their baby is sleeping through the night at such a young age. Like they are expecting to get some sort of badge of honor for that. They really need to be put in check and reminded that most babies are not ready to sleep through the night until at least the age of 4 months (4-6 depending on what professional you ask.) It is especially dangerous not to feed your baby for more than 3 hours in the first few weeks of life, 4hrs if you formula feed. A baby needs to eat at least 8-12 times a day for the first month, meaning every 2-3 hours. You actually have to wake your baby if he is not waking to eat, so that she doesn't get dehydrated and blood sugar doesn't fall too low. A baby's stomach is so small. It doesn't hold much and it doesn't take long for it to completely empty again. I'm sure the conversation would change quickly if you present these facts.

People love to brag, why? because they think it makes them look like better parents. They like to make themselves look like parents of the year. As if sleeping through the night, early teeth and walking had anything to do with them or their parenting. It has nothing to do with parenting! Its all part of nature. You can facilitate sleeping through the night but the huge factor lies within the baby's natural ability to fall asleep and stay asleep, at an age when they are good and ready. In fact, according to the National Sleep Foundation, it's not until 9 months, 70-80% of babies start sleeping through the night.

I had someone once tell me their baby was walking at 6 months. So your child is the child that's in the Guinness world book of records?  The only child ever recorded to walk that early? I don't even think people realize the nonsense that comes out of their mouth. The normal range for walking is anywhere from 9-18 months. And the majority of babies don't take their first steps until after their first Birthday. I don't know why people brag about this anyway. I'm not in a rush to have my baby walk. I want to spend more time cuddling with her, rather than chasing after her.

And whats with the first tooth thing? So your baby is cooler than mine because she got her first tooth? Really? What are you bragging about? because you had NOTHING to do with tooth eruption either. Your not a better parent because your child had their first tooth super early. Unless that tooth is made of gold you have nothing to brag about. Every child is different, and develops at different stages. In a few months my baby will have teeth, just like yours.

There is no need to drive yourself nuts over what these kind of moms are saying, and trying to compare your baby to theirs. Chances are, they are not being 100% honest. Since you can't prove whether or not they are telling the truth, the polite thing to do is let it go in one ear and out the other.What's the point of starting an argument over something that might not even be true. If a bragging mom is really getting under your skin, here are some funny comebacks. You also have the choice of not conversing with that person. Why talk to someone that's not  going to be honest with you about their experiences and constantly puts you or your baby down. If you can, avoid these type of moms all together. If you can't, then just simply let them know that you are proud of your child's development and they still have a ways to go to erupt teeth and walk. As far as sleeping through the night, tell them you don't mind waking up at night, it gives you more opportunity to bond with your baby. Make something positive out of the situation. It might stop them from being so annoying!

Every baby is so different. Yes, some do achieve their milestones very early. They walk early, talk early and even sleep through the night early. You should be proud of your little one. However, it is completely unfair to make someone feel like their baby is inadequate because yours hit the milestones early. Perhaps your baby walked early, but will talk very late. It's better to bite your tongue, especially around people who may be struggling with their baby. Babies grow and develop differently. That's why there are such huge age ranges for developmental milestones. Listen to medical professionals on when your baby should reach certain milestones, not Jonhnny's mom.Your pediatrician will let you know when your baby is delayed in an area of development, but chances are you have plenty of time to enjoy watching your baby explore. If you are not sure if your baby is hitting her milestones on time. There is an awesome chart on Baby Center. It shows what most kids at a certain age can do, what half of kids can do, and what very few kids at that age can do. So you can have a good and honest comparison of how your baby stacks up. Here's the chart, just click on your child's age group http://www.babycenter.com/baby-milestones

And if you could use a good laugh about this topic. Take a look at this  "The Humble Brag".
Time to share!

In effort to keep up with my blog, every week or so I will be posting something I would like to share with you. Something that I have come across in the midst of all my crazy research, that I found helpful.

This week I'm sharing a free audio recording I got from sleep specialist Dana Obleman. It answers all your most common sleep questions. Such as: At what age should my child be sleeping through the night?  Should I be using a pacifier to help my baby fall asleep? and many more. Check it out http://www.sleepsense.net/answers/

And if your are interested in getting a free customized sleep report.
www.sleepsense.net